Happy 4th Birthday Ms. Ella!

I cannot believe that my little girl is now 4. We took her to dinner at Texas Roadhouse because that's what she chose. She LOVES eating the peanuts and throwing them on the floor (guess because she can't do that at home). She also wanted to go somewhere that the wait staff would sing to her. Soooooooooooo...... even though they don't really sing, they do however, yell out a YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO like a cowboy and she just gleamed with joy!

Ms. Ella is such a little lady now. She is so smart and has such a creative mind. I love the way she talks and the way she thinks. I cannot believe how much I fall in love with her more each and every day. This little girl has made all my dreams come true about being a mom and I cannot imagine one day of the last 3 1/2 years without her in it.

However, in my own joy over watching her grow and change, I have to think about a woman half way around the world that is thinking about a little baby girl that she gave birth to 4 years ago today and laid beside an Iron Ox sculpture in the XianXing Scenic Park in FengCheng China. I wish I could telepathically tell her THANK YOU and tell her what an amazing daughter she gave us and how wonderful it has been to be her mother. I think about this woman, Ella's birth mom, so often and hurt for her because I can only imagine what she must have went through making the decision she did to abandon her baby girl. I wish I could tell her what a gift she has given me.....I wish I could show her Ella's beautiful face.... her birth mom's face ..... I wish she could hear her talk and see how smart she is. I know that one day there will come a time when Ella will want to know about her birth parents and even though we have told her since she was a baby that she was adopted, we have only recently talked about her birth parents. I only hope that I have the courage and strength to answer any and all her questions honestly and with care. I never want her to feel unloved or unwanted but I do want her to grow up knowing that SHE was the best thing that has ever happened to me. She is my life and I love her with ALL of me.

Happy Birthday Sweet Pea!!!!!!!!!!!!


Love,

MOMMY